Funny Men Quotes and Sayings

Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman.

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.

Men are easy to get but hard to keep.
- Mae West

Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.

Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths.
- Lois Wyse

No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won’t make you cry.

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.
- Oscar Wilde

Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less.
- S B Anthony

Man has will, but woman has her way.

There are two things no man will admit he cannot do well: drive and make love.

Men are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time and they are gone.

A man in the house is worth two in the street.

Men play the game; women know the score.
- Roger Woddis

There are two perfectly good men, one dead, and the other unborn.
- Chinese Proverb

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.
- Gloria Steinem

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Wise men are not always silent, but they know when to be.

Men forget but never forgive. Women forgive but never forget.

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself.
- Louis Nizer